Adam Rafferty – Guitar and Spirit

All about music, guitar, spirituality, personal development and being happy

Allow it to Happen

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In all the “Law of Attraction” material that is out there, the last step of achieving one’s desire is “allowing”.

In the book “Ask and it is Given” we are told that it is a 3 step process:

1) Ask
2) It is always given
3) Allow it to flow into your life

Other books I have read as well and courses I have studied describe wording goal statements starting with “I allow”. Pure genius! And the truth!

The concept of “allowing” is very different from the concept of “making it happen”. Many of us (including me at times) think we need to “make it happen”.

“Allowing” lets you feel that the good things you want are just “out there” and you are an “open window” which will allow the “breeze” to blow in. My whole body relaxes when I think of it this way.

I can remember as a kid how much I loved to draw. And I never had the feeling that “I” was drawing. Ok, I am not trying to sound like I was a little Zen master genius here, but what I am trying to say was that I “allowed” the drawing to happen, just by feeling my way.

On the outside people see me drawing – but I am talking about my inner experience, and more importantly – your inner experience.

I would just keep adjusting things until the drawing looked right.

Anytime I have taken the “I’m gonna make it happen” approach – well, it is very a righteous ego and caffeine induced state. I can brag and boast and look like a tough go-getter guy to my friends and family, but sooner or later – I run out of steam. Nice for a cocktail party or holiday dinner to impress, but a crappy way to live.

And who was I fighting anyway? That’s what I mean by inner experience…to “make it happen” is exhausting on an inner level – it feels like a fight. No one else will experience that fight but you. To “allow it to happen” is relaxing – and will tickle you with laughter when you see that you didn’t have to work so hard to get the thing you wanted. This stuff works. I know from personal experience. Keep reading.

Once you have the vision of what you want, and your answer is given to you – you can, simply by getting yourself out of the way – allow these things into your life. Sometimes the feeling of “wanting” can block out the thing we want!

This was on my mind this morning because I was with my girlfriend last night and she had been discussing me with a co-worker. I commend her on choosing such a noteworthy topic. 🙂 Seriously though, her co-worker asked her “how does he find work?” since I am a musician.

Jill replied “he’s at home making it happen right now”. I had been working on my website all day.

That’s when I told her I wasn’t “making” it happen, from my point of view. I lived many years with the idea that I was going to “make it happen Goddammit!!!” And you see – the contraction, the disallowing of other solutions, the looking at the glass half empty, the hurry – all make the attitude of “making it happen” totally discouraging and unlivable as a long-term way of life. It is a jaw-clenched, un-accepting, angry state where very little good can flow in. It’s like screaming at the window that no breeze is coming in.

Let me give a small example. Here’s what was happening in my world yesterday as it looked like I was “making it happen” (little did they know – I was “allowing”).

Weeks prior I had started fooling around with the idea that i needed a new website design, one that would incorporate my new acoustic guitar stuff. It was right then – the desire to have the new website was set into motion, and I knew full well that it would happen. I had not done a lick of work yet, it was only an idea. I knew that eventually my website would get designed and updated, and no stress was needed. It’s as if I considered it done – simply because I knew I had put my attention on it. Kind of like a farmer knowing he’ll get a potato because he planted the seed.

Yesterday was the day I sat down and said “lets see what old Photoshop and Dreamweaver have to say about this”. I looked at the old site and noticed I’d have to pull old material over. I looked at my current life and added recent pics. Basically I sat at the Mac and the vision in my mind directed the hands and brain from 10am until 6pm. (p.s. – it’s still not finished)

So – one would say the website was created yesterday, and that I was “really friggin’ making it happen!!!” but NO! The website was created before I touched the computer. The idea was there. Simply by paying attention and letting it happen, it has started to sprout by itself.

This is not only about a website. It’s about you, your dreams, your aspirations, your family, your livelihood, where you want to live. You are just like me inside. We may look very different, but we’re really the same. And, we are all creators – and when we know how fun it is to create, we want to keep doing it. Anything in our lives starts in our minds, and pours forth into our realities.

Just think- a Thanksgiving meal with turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, rolls, veggies, apple cider and pumpkin pie – all starts as an idea. From there on in, it pretty much plays itself out and no “making it happen” stress is required. You “allow” it to happen.

The next thing which follows is a trip to the market. Then prep work in the kitchen, the oven preheat, the table setting, the timing so that everything is ready at the same time and piping hot – are all ways that you will allow the original vision to unfold.

So – next Thanksgiving, when you see the food on the table – you can have a good spiritual fuzzy feeling in your belly – knowing that it in fact started with an idea (this also works even if you didn’t cook the food). And then ponder that this manifesting ideas into reality can happen in your life.

In years past I have in my life had my stomach in knots – from “wanting” the following:

1) a sideman gig on guitar with a jazz legend
2) a great girlfriend
3) to live independently
4) earn a living as a freelancer
5) to tour with my band
6) a guitar career as a performer on the festival circuit

Once I let go of the exhausting, burnt-out feeling of “wanting” and started the gentle “allowing” I got:

1) a sideman gig with Dr. Lonnie Smith, and another with Bennie Wallace and Alvin Queen
2) Jill. I love this girl!
3) My studio apartment, paid for
3) No debt, making money doing what I love
4) I play the guitar and write music, teach lessons
5) I have done about 10 tours as a leader in Europe

and now this is on it’s way…I know it

6) a new world as a solo acoustic performer. I’m finishing the CD and getting out there and people are digging the music. It’s fun and I dig it!

All this came from an inner state of “allowing”, not “making it happen”. It looks like a person “making it happen” – but it’s not. Of course I have to be an active participant just like the person who made the Thanksgiving meal a few paragraphs ago, but that’s the allowing part.

So, why not look for the “wanting” in your own life – and drop it. That’s right, drop the feeling of “wanting”, or the “I gotta make it happen”.

I highly recommend these for further reading: “The Sedona Method” by Hale Dwoskin, “The Abundance Course” by Larry Crane, and “Ask and It is Given” by Esther and Jerry Hicks.

Just go to or Barnes & Noble.

Ask, and the books will be given!!! 🙂

Author: Adam Rafferty

Adam Rafferty. Fingerstyle Guitarist. Recording and Concert Artist. Meditator. Philosopher. Lover of Groove.

One thought on “Allow it to Happen

  1. Enlightening!

    I have noticed this phenomenon many times, the best way I have found to fail to achieve something is to tell someone. But if I quietly go about my business for myself and only myself then slowly but surely I will succeed.

    I asked for the books but they asked for money! Maybe they will be given! Argh!


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